Why this question is asked—and why context matters
One of the most repeated accusations levelled at Islam in Western debates is that it “condones domestic violence”. In this video, Saleh Family’s Will and Sana address that claim directly, asking a simple but essential question: are we reading the verse in its proper context, and are we interpreting the Arabic word in a way that actually fits?
Rather than approaching the verse as a soundbite, they encourage viewers to understand the Quran through the life of the Prophet ﷺ. In their words, the Quran is understood through the Prophet’s lived example—meaning that the “real time” representation of the text in the Sunnah is crucial when discussing difficult passages.
Surah An-Nisa: the verse is part of a wider scenario
Will and Sana explain that Surah An-Nisa is not describing an everyday, casual disagreement. They describe the surrounding context as relating to a marriage “on the rocks”. In this framework, the verse lays out a graduated response.
They outline the sequence mentioned in the passage as presented in the discussion:
- Admonish her (sternly): speaking seriously and firmly about what is not acceptable in the marriage.
- Separate from the bed: creating a barrier of intimacy while the issues are addressed.
- The final instruction involving “daraba”: commonly translated as “to hit”. This is where the video focuses heavily on meaning.
In short, the video argues that you cannot responsibly start and stop at the final phrase without understanding the steps before it.
The Arabic word “daraba” is described as deeply flexible
A major part of the discussion is linguistic: the Arabic word “daraba” is presented as a “rich” term with “dozens of different meanings”. The video’s approach is not to “liberalise” the verse, but to ask which translation fits best in context.
Will and Sana compare how English words can have multiple meanings—illustrating with examples such as “strike” (strike someone, strike gold, a strike against you). Their point is that meaning depends on usage, not assumption.
Within the discussion, they specifically reference the possibility that “daraba” can carry meanings linked to separation or leaving—rather than physical striking—suggesting that a contextual reading may make more sense alongside the earlier steps of admonishment and separation from intimacy.
What the Prophet ﷺ did in his marriages
The video then turns from language to practice: what did the Prophet ﷺ actually do?
Will and Sana cite Aisha (RA) as saying that the Prophet ﷺ never raised a hand—not to his wives, not to servants, and not to anyone. They describe this as a universally understood fact in the discussion.
They also emphasise that the Prophet ﷺ discouraged and reprimanded men who committed domestic abuse. In the video’s framing, this matters because the Sunnah functions as the explanation of how the Quran is lived.
Was there a time when his marriages were strained?
Yes, they say—without going into every detail beyond what is mentioned in the video. The discussion states that there was a period when the Prophet ﷺ separated from his wives for about a month (as referenced in the video). Will and Sana suggest this as evidence that, when the relationship was difficult, the Prophet’s response included separation.
They connect this back to the earlier contextual reading of the verse: if separation occurred in the Prophet’s life, then a meaning of “daraba” connected to separating or leaving may align better than the assumption of violence.
“Hit lightly” and “use a miswak” — where is the evidence?
Will and Sana acknowledge that some people argue Muslims may “hit lightly” or use something like a miswak. But they challenge this by raising an evidence question: if someone claims Islam permits a form of striking, what proof is there?
In the video, they argue that if the claim cannot be supported with clear evidence, it should not be treated as the default interpretation. They also stress that the debate exists among scholars about the meaning and application—so viewers should not reduce the issue to a simplistic accusation.
Graduated steps: admonish, then distance—before any further issue is considered
One of the central themes is that Islamic guidance, as explained in the video, is structured and layered. The response described in the discussion focuses on:
- Serious conversation and admonishment to address wrongdoing and protect the marriage.
- Separation from intimacy to create space for issues to be resolved.
- A meaning of “daraba” that may align with separation/leaving—supported (in their view) by Arabic flexibility and by the Prophet ﷺ’s actions.
They also emphasise that marriage is “a serious thing”, and that the aim of guidance should be reconciliation and harm prevention—not oppression.
What to do if you’re uncertain: speak to scholars and check the Sunnah
Will and Sana conclude with an important attitude for viewers: don’t accept a translation or a ruling simply because it is repeated online. Ask what the Arabic word can mean, what the verse context says, and how the Prophet ﷺ demonstrated the Quran in practice.
They encourage people to consult scholars and engage thoughtfully. In their view, once you consider the Quran’s context, the range of meaning in the Arabic, and the Prophet’s explicit example—especially the condemnation of abuse and the report that he never raised a hand—many people will reassess their conclusions.
Further resources from Saleh Family
If you’d like to explore more from Saleh Family, the video description includes several links, including their guide on relocating from Canada to Malaysia, plus ways to connect through their channels and community.
- Guide: How we left Canada, to live in Malaysia
- Connect: Saleh Family
- Podcast: Saleh Family Speaks
Plan your next meaningful journey with Sakina Tours
Discussions like this highlight how travel can also be about learning—whether that means exploring Islamic history in meaningful places, visiting cities shaped by scholarship, or experiencing cultures through respectful curiosity. If you’d like support planning a trip that blends inspiration, comfort, and substance, get in touch with Sakina Tours for a curated itinerary tailored to you.
